Here there be monsters (socratic) wrote,
Here there be monsters

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We all wanna be big big stars, yeah, but we all got different reasons for that.

I have, at the minimum, three entries in me at the moment. I don't know if I'll get them all down but I might as well take a shot at it. The last time I tried to write something my computer crashed, I got very very frustrated, and wrote a rather explicit entry (since deleted) that eliminated my newest "friend of" before he even made a comment in my journal. He didn't seem to be the type to get along with me anyway (even LESS than most) but I'm going to try not to do that again just on principal.

I guess I should start by outlining the events of the past week plus.

The biggest thing was the ending of school. As I mentioned earlier I got my takehome exam for War and Politics during World War Two on Wednesday and it was due on Monday. The thing is…on Tuesday I left my notebook in Spanish class. My notebook with all my carefully taken notes that I needed to write the test. I spent Saturday catching up on some of the readings I hadn't gotten to yet so I didn't discover that the notebook was missing until Sunday. I'll admit, I went a little nuts at that point. I had only about 10 hours to write a test that would account for 100% of my grade and my notebook was missing. After shattering about three drinking glasses that nobody ever uses against the wall in my room (unfortunatly I flung them hard enough to get a room covering spray, so even a week later I keep having to pick glass out of my feet) I spent about two hours searching everywhere for the notebook, even going back to the Spanish classroom where I had left it (unfortunatly my teacher had picked it up after I'd left, I say unfortunate because other people have left stuff there over a weekend and it's been there on Tuesday, so I could have gotten the notebook if he hadn't taken it) In the end I just went from what was in the readings and what I remembered and wrote my ten page paper that way. Of course, because my life never throws just ONE obstacle in my way (I don't suppose anyone's life ever does) I had a Spanish Oral group meeting at 8:00 so I had to completely switch gears to head to that. It took two hours because nobody else was stupid enough to take FOUR summer classes and they all had time to burn (plus 10 minutes was wasted talking to Nicole's astoundingly gay, like he was out of some bad Saturday night live skit, cousin Dean) I ended up convincing them we should do "The Dating Show" en Espanol, because I needed to get the hell out of there. I left while they were all starting on dinner which kind of sucked since I would've enjoyed having a half decent conversation with them that didn't revolve around the stupid project.

I spent the rest of the night and the next morning working on the test, finishing it during the coffee break we have halfway through the class. It was less than wonderful but I handed it in anyway.

On Monday I had to go down to Sean's office on Wall-Street to finish prepping the Spanish group oral presentation. It was pretty annoying since I also had an essay to write for Spanish. I'd never been to a Wall-Street office before though, so that was something. Of course the guard refused to let me up because I didn't have a driver's license (apparently my work and School IDs weren't enough). This wouldn't have been so irritating if not for the fact that Sean had told us all about how he gets in to work EVERY day with a picture of Osama Bin Laden on his Identification Card (He's not lying either, I've seen his ID and it is Osama.) Apparently they have an Osama Yes, Jews NO policy. Eventually Janet showed up and she bullied the guard into letting us up (women can bully security guards because they aren't threatening…when men try it they call the cops on us L). We solidified our presentation and I saw Ground Zero for the first time from a nice view from the conference room. Apparently one of the partners at Sean's firm actually saw a plane hit the towers and had a nervous breakdown and quit. Interesting.

Tuesday was uneventful except for my discovering what had happened to my notebook (I got it back from my professor.) I also got an extra day for both the oral presentation and the paper.

Wednesday I got my exam for WWII class back. It was an A/A- and I ended up with an A in the class. Not bad for a no-notebook performance although with the notebook and a lot less stress I might have pulled off an A+ (most of the problems were not with information that I'd forgotten, since I have a good memory, but rather due to stress induced poor grammar/word choice which basically NEVER happens to me.) There weren't that many As in the class either, and some of the people who had looked down on all the questions I asked got Bs or even B-s. Asking questions might make you look uninformed but apparently it DOES help you learn the material. Imagine that.

Wednesday evening I handed in my Spanish essay and we did our oral presentation, which we got an A on. It was the last of that class except for the test on Thursday. I feel a little melancholy since I enjoyed the class and I am now done with my Foreign Language requirement. I met a bunch of interesting people in Spanish class, I guess because it's not at all major specific so you get to mix with the sorts of people you wouldn't encounter in other classes.

The test on Thursday was fairly easy. I even found two errors that the professor had made on the exam (one where he included the answer to a question after the blank for it and one where he mixed up informal and formal verb forms.) Sean invited the rest of the Spanish group out for drinks after the class ended but didn't bother to invite me. I don't know if this was because he knew I couldn't go (Yeah, yeah I'm underage without a fake ID. I make no claims not to be a square) or because I didn't eat with them that night so didn't get to engage in all the bonding or because he just found me annoying. I guess it's not important although I would have liked to get a chance to engage in one of those post class ritual thingees.

I'm almost sure that I'll get at the very minimum an A- in Spanish, and possibly as much as an A+ (I got an A+ on my last composition and my instructor told another student that he grades more on feel than on a straight points basis, plus I did the extra credit and did a good job on it, AND the class will probably be curved because so many people did so god damned poorly)

So what did I learn this summer? I mean besides a little Spanish and the odd fact about the second world war. I'm not sure to tell the truth. I did learn that even working at full capacity I can get done what I need to get done. I learned that when stressed towards my limits (I wasn't AT them per se, just closer than I've been recently) I turn into even more of an asshole. Not to the point of actually hurting people's feelings or anything, more just restless and jerky.

I also continued my feelings of intense disatisfaction with the way my life is headed which I can't really explain. I mean I'm getting the stuff I need to get done DONE. What the hell's the problem?

As for work…well it goes. I didn't go much last week because I don't know if I'll be paid for it, but I'm getting done what I need to get done. I don't know if they're getting fed up with me because I've been so stressed out recently but nobody's said anything (except Andrea who is apparently bitch to EVERYONE.)

I need to make some decisions about next semester soon…which is coming at me like a freight train. It's been almost two years without a real break…which is normal for most people but not for a student.

Fortunatly I've always been a dull boy so all work and little play hasn't done all that much to me in that respect.
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