As a witness I forgot the name of the company I was supposed to work for (Why the FUCK would the cross-examiner ask me that? It would be covered in the initial testimony. That just caught me totally off-guard since it was totally irrelevant to the point at hand.) and I was too distressed over being cut off so early to add the twist I was planning to add. The whole experience just flew by.
I don't know. I'm pretty sure I failed. I did see one girl's rating and it said probable but I don't know if that was for me or someone else and she was one of those super-polite people so if she gave only a probable I doubt I scored higher than a possible with any of the numerous assholes.
I just have to put it out of my mind and move past it. They made me come half an hour early which just made me nervous and out of synch. It was badly handled and poorly run. I have just gained more proof of the wisdom of isolationism. That's something at least. I gave it a show and it was as shitty and stupid as I ever predicted in my most pecimistic moments.
I went for a nice ride this morning (cleared my head a little) and I raised my bike seat about 4 inches which has given me a lot more power and comfort. I need to get back into serious bicycling.
I now feel totally and completely adrift. No direction whatsoever.
I'm about as miserable as I've been in the past year or so. Woohoo.