Here there be monsters (socratic) wrote,
Here there be monsters

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Trouble going down

Everyone is all thankful for the brave soldiers risking their lives in Iraq so that Halliburton can be free to soak the U.S. people; but what about those soldiering along here on the homefront in a conflict that's just as dangerous and probably more important to most Americans than Cheney's war? I'm talking, of course, about porno actors. Despite the fact that two porn stars have tested positive for HIV this week, these brave men and women continue to venture forth beneath the hot lights and perform their duties so that Americans can satisfy their insatiable lust for creative new ways of showing two people bump uglies. Porn is an $8 billion a year industry, admitedly peanuts compared to the $80+ billion we'll be paying to clean up the mess G.W. Bush made while avenging what almost happened to his daddy, but probably responsible for creating more jobs than the tax cuts did.

Porn is an American institution. It supports independent video stores that otherwise would have long ago gone under to Blockbuster, it keeps lonely men on business trips from having to pack a book or actually talk to other people outside their hotel room, not to mention saving them from dependency on sleep medication (12 minutes and they're out like a light) and lining the pockets of some of the biggest corporations in the world. Porn is democratic, no matter what your tastes, ranging from hardcore S&M to gay midgets blowing antelopes, you can find something that matches your interests. Porn is universal. From Hollywood big shots who buy what they think are snuff films to the local Baptist minister who just needs a little straight nookie, after a Sunday morning spent bleating to the sheep to take the edge off, porn crosses cultural and socioeconomic boundaries.

Nobody talks about the Porn stars and how they sacrifice day after day, having sex with strangers in public places while some fat guy shoves a camera in the direction of their genitals and a sleazy mob-connected guy shouts directions. They are also risking their lives, STDs have always been a risk in porn (since nobody really wants to see sex with condoms involved) and now there are documented cases of HIV. The Porn Soldiers soldier on, risking life and genitals for the betterment of mankind. The lack of condoms could be compared to the fact that some of the soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan (wait we're still in Afghanistan? Nobody talks about that!) aren't being given flack jackets or other necessary equipment because Rummy doesn't want to spend the money. Easier to just seduce another young lad into dying in the test of wills between George Bush and Osama Bin Laden (A test of wills where both men are quite eager to kill off hundreds or thousands of youths to prove their bravery but not so eager to risk their own necks) than to have to tax his rich friends in order to be able to financially support the war he started. He'd have to actually ask Ken Lay to give up one of his estates just so some farm boy from Idaho has a chance of living when some Habib draws a bead on him, while he tries to provide aid to an even younger boy who had his arm blown off in a suicide bomb? You can always get a new Idaho farm boy, but how are you supposed to replace that Fabrige Egg that Kenny wouldn't be able to buy at auction if he were actually taxed on his income?

Of course some wussy porn stars are refusing to have sex for money on camera now that the risk of AIDS is floating around, which means others are having to pull double duty with sore genitals and plenty of coke to perk up tired eyes, so they can look like they're enjoying it for the camera. This is like how our soldiers are being asked to spend extra time over there in Iraq because the Wolfowitz plan had no plan for a post Saddam era and we're losing control of the country. Just because you've been in the desert for almost a year now, have never seen your daughter in person, and had to hear about your father's funeral in a letter that got to you 3 weeks after he died, doesn't mean you deserve a chance to go home now. You can stay an extra six months can't you? George Bush takes more than enough vacations for the lot of you guys! He's the most vacationing president in U.S. history, you know! And when you're kissing the ground behind a burnt out car in Fallujah, listening to tracer fire and RPGs blast overhead, instead of lying in your wife's bed in Cleveland listening to the sound of the rain and the honking horns that tell you you're home, I'm sure you'll be happy to know that more likely than not Bush is at Crawford clearing some brush. Who cares if your hedges go untrimmed, your trees unpruned, you lose your civilian job due to extra long deployment time (if you're a reservist) or your girlfriend moves on? Bush's ranch is in tip top shape and he's sworn that you will NOT go home until he feels that his political goals have been met over there.

The brave porn soldiers are mostly kids, teens and early twenties. They signed up for the life not knowing that they would be expected to do triple anal with the risk of AIDS. They do it anyway. They do it because it's their job and they have a sense of duty. The real soldiers are mostly kids too. They signed up to protect the country, to stand on the walls of this great country and keep the barbarians from the gate. They didn't know the barbarians were not only inside the city but firmly planted on the throne. They signed up to give their blood and sweat, their limbs and bodies, their lives and souls for the protection of the homeland (not the security of the homeland, Tom Ridge is in charge of that) and its people. They didn't sign up to die in some desert so that Bush doesn't have to admit he made a horrible mistake. At least they get some credit though. At least people care about their fate. The porn soldiers don't have a single monument in Washington.

The American people will continue to buy porn no matter how many lives are lost in its production. No matter who has to suffer and sacrifice so they can enjoy beat off material. I'm not passing judgement, god knows I've seen my share of blue movies, I'm just stating a fact. The demand for pornography will not be dropping any time soon, no matter how many church leaders, who are more than happy to steal from charities or lie to their parishoners, rail against it, or how many Justice department people Ashcroft hires to try to illegalize constitutionally protected expression. George Bush will keep fighting the good fight no matter how many Americans are maimed or killed in a battle that can never be fully won. It's not a quagmire, it's the end of American dominance thanks to American arrogance. If this country has enough stupid people, enough blind ignorant unthinking goosesteppers to elect George Bush back into office then this country will hasten the inevitable collapse of its empire by decades. And more soldiers will die under a shroud of lies and manipulation. If enough people come to understand that tax cuts for the rich and death for the soldiers is not a good policy for Joe Average then maybe we'll have a fighting chance of not going to pot for awhile yet.

Meanwhile the Porn Soldiers will continue to die. They will continue to give their young lives to the nationwide circle jerk that is their industry. They won't get credit for it either, at least not enough. You can never give enough credit for that kind of thing, there isn't a monument in the world tall enough or a speech eloquent enough. Someone laying their life down for you, it's a thing that defies description. It's an act so momentous it hurts just to think of it, it can make you cry, because you know it can never be repaid. It's one of those things that language wasn't designed to express. Onward Porn soldiers. Let's hope as many of you make it through this trying time as safely as possible. Let's not forget the ones who don't.

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