Here there be monsters (socratic) wrote,
Here there be monsters

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My thinking goes in cycles. It's strange because I think I'm getting somewhere and I just end up back where I was. I'm not sure if I'm climbing some metaphorical wall but keep falling down or just spinning my metaphorical wheels.

I'm back to thinking that there are certain skills I haven't developed yet and because of my advanced age I will never master them. This is making me resigned which is what my mood wood be were that to be an option.

This summer has been mostly wasted. I am a waste of skin. Hee-Ann isn't going to email me before the final test in his class so I'm going to have to go it alone.

I am pathetic
I am unloveable
I am alone
I am not smart
I am not destined for anything
I am not permanently scarred by my father's sucide
I am not a victim

I am just below average.

Just another schlub building block of society for the great ones to stand on.

Just chattal.

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