On the negative side of things I think I'm sick. I hadn't been feeling well these first couple of days but I chalked that up to lack of sleep and stress. Well I got plenty of sleep last night and I woke up feeling even crappier than I did before. To be honest I suspected I might be getting sick last night. It would make sense. All the stuff I've been doing and the increased bike exercise I've been overextending, and I was ill relatively recently so my immune system might still have been recovering from that. It's nothing terrible, I'll still go into work since I'm not sneezing or anything, but it's a pain in the ass. I was wondering why my mood was down despite having gotten the job and despite the fact that I had a great boss and was doing some stuff that was moving me in the direction I want my life to go. This explains it. I was also a bit awkward on the phone and cloudy headed yesterday. Same explanation. I'm sure I'll be fine by Monday.
Which is good, since I need to get started on a bunch of things. I won't have class on Monday because it's a holiday, but I do want to get my camera and start writing and filming my own stuff, as well as start studying for the GREs. It's time to get moving on my applications for school, which are due in just three months or so. You might ask why I would start working on stuff 3 months out which is so unlike me that those of you who have been reading this journal for longer than a month or two probably think it's been taken over by a space alien, or worse a mature person. Rest assured, I am neither. Okay I can't guarantee I'm not a space alien, sometimes they don't know, they're like sleepers or changelings or something, but I can assure you that I am NOT mature! See my hormones have been trying to force me to attempt to form some sort of romantic connection to womankind, or rather a single unnamed incidence thereof. Now you might say "Great! Give in. Go out and search for somebody." That might even seem, to you, to be a reasonable thing to say.
They got to you, didn't they? With their neurochemical powers and siren-like song. FIE! I shan't be taking their fell advice, nor yours, you callous cur! I know myself to be completely unready at this time, physically, emotionally, financially, an innumerable number of other -allys to boot. Heck I gained another pound this week thanks to lax eating habits and water intention brought on by disease. Self-control is something I've never mastered when stressed or sick. I will eventually, but not yet. So I know myself to be unready and I won't let my traitorous endocrine system nor its dastardly allies sway me from my position. So I'm launching a counteroffensive. I'm going to get busy and work on doing some of the stuff I've been false-starting on all summer. Working this job is a good reminder that creativity alone is not nearly enough. There's a ton of work that needs to be done, and a lot of luck and pimping too. It's not so much a downer as it is a spur to get cracking.
I say that a lot, but eventually it will become reality.
As soon as my head clears up. And my joints don't ache. And maybe my bowels stop erupting. That would be nice.