Here there be monsters (socratic) wrote,
Here there be monsters

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Someone replied to one of my posts, a reminder of the differences between this thing and an actual bound paper journal. People who read this can admit it. It's comforting and scary at the same time to think that strangers could be reading my thoughts. Comforting because it means that there's a semi-realistic chance that by putting all this out "there" there is a chance that there could be constructive results outside of catharsis. Scary because it means there is also the potential for judgement. I am not sure why I care about the judgement of strangers, but I do.

I'm going to "Annie Get Your Gun" tomorrow and I'm feeling pretty insecure about it (Me insecure? I bet that's a shocker that knocked you out of your knickers) You see not only is it a rather low brow show (I picked it as an insult to my terrible music teacher, an insult I ended up paying about $120 to make and that was not understood by its target) but it apparently is currently staring Crystal Bernard. I used to think she was very sexy back when I was young and Wings was popular. I'm going to be embarassed to sit in the audience live and watch her. It's rediculous I know, I mean TV stars are used to people finding them attractive and it's not like I ever did anything about my attraction or even told anyone about it. It's also highly unlikely that she will notice me in the audience (and even if she did she would not know who I am of course so I'd just be an ugly face in the crowd), but I'm still a bit leary of going.

I'm pretty spectacular in my awkwardness aren't I?

Music class is speeding towards me. I'm allowed one absence and I should take it so I can study but for some reason I think I'm gonna go just because if I take one day off I might not ever go again. This post is definitly of low quality, but that' Stewart Smalley would say.... okay.

I've decided to try my hand at writing songs because they're short and if I fail I can discount it as something that I don't TRULY care about. This of course sets me up failure as the only option, but at least it will be writing (beyond this thingee) and that's a step in the right direction. Small steps...right? Can't climb a mountain in a single bound. Sometimes I feel like not enough people give me a chance as a friend. Sometimes I think that a Whiny bitch like myself doesn't deserve any friends. Sometimes I Capitalize words for No reason but I do it on instinct, even in formal writing.

Socrates never wrote anything down but he had an incredibly profound effect on human history. Was it because he was lucky enough to have Plato for a student or was it because Plato was lucky enough to have him for a teacher?
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