Here there be monsters (socratic) wrote,
Here there be monsters

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All a part of my hairbrained scheme

All my collaborations collapsed on me over the last couple of days, and I'm left feeling slightly stunned and scrambling to see the bright side. My friend Gabe, who I was developing some scripts for, is apparently moving to Italy in early February to follow his German girlfriend (who grew up in France) so all those shorts are sort of down the tubes. The Israeli MBA is working on a music video in honor of his dead sister, so he's not exactly going to be wanting help with that. Some other potential leads have fallen through.

I don't know if there's anything to be taken away from this in terms of lessons. I already avoided putting all my eggs in one basket and I have some other irons in the fire, but nothing as immediate. I still have my job for now and I guess this change means that I should be less hesitant about looking for a new position that's full time. I also guess I can focus on writing feature scripts rather than shorts since alone I'm not going to produce anything. I don't have the social aggressiveness to gather people together and create an apparatus. I'm not, at heart, a producer.

Of course I don't know if writing features will produce any results either. I've only shown my recent work to one person and while he liked it his reaction was too positive, it didn't point out many of the significant flaws, thus making the feedback pretty irrelevant. The only way to improve is to keep plugging away though. I am getting a little depressed because I feel like I'm only a consumer these days and my boss is going BACK to LA for the next week leaving me alone to stew, but I have to fight that off and keep going. I need to maintain faith in myself and keep my eye on my goals. It isn't easy at all but it's the only path that's but there, the only one that makes sense.
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