Here there be monsters (socratic) wrote,
Here there be monsters

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If the tumor don't fit you must quit this mortal coil

I wanted to write an insouciant entry about the death of Johnny Cochran, saying something like "O.J. expressed grief at the loss of his friend and said that now that Johnny's gone he plans to hang up his killing glove for good. 'I still might get off, but without Johnny it wouldn't be the same' said a sincere Juice. When asked whether he'd make an exception for Ann Coulter the Juice replied that he wouldn't need to since she looks like her feeding tube was removed in 1985 and she could perish at any moment"

but I'm not going to. For one Cochran has received too much derision over the years for doing his job, and for another there's too many jokes being made already.

Instead I'm going to talk about the far more interesting subject of me. I got my treadmill today, after almost a month of waiting. They delivered it at around 2:30 (I love their 8:00 AM to 6:00 PM window policy.) The box was much bigger than I expected and they refused to set up the treadmill in the room where I wanted it, which was a serious problem since the only other place it might fit would be in the living room, where I wouldn't have access to any entertainments and where it would be a huge eyesore. I ended up having to bribe them with $60 to assemble it in the living room and then move it where I wanted it, but that's pretty much de rigeur when it comes to delivery guys. As for the thing itself, it's great. It's a huge health-club style treadmill with safety key, automated elevation up to 15 degrees, and all sorts of exercise routines and display options. I used it for about an hour and a half today (Not all at once) and it's comfortable to walk on and easy to work up a sweat with. I like it much better than using an exercise bike because my butt doesn't get sore and I find the walking/jogging to be a much more natural and pleasant movement. It also allows you to set a pace electronically rather than having to manually maintain the pace, which is just a psychological thing but not insignificant because of that.

I needed to strip down to just my underpants and socks to be able to squeeze under the weight capacity, which was embarrassing, but it offers an opportunity at a fresh start in a way. Begin at the very end of the spectrum and work my way up, that kind of thing. I've already begun the process of channeling boredom and frustration into a brisk walk rather than an ice cream bar, and I have faith that I will be able to complete that process. It's what I'm all about.

Anyway besides the whole treadmill thing I also managed to get past a significant writing block, and that's a good thing. I'm really improving both as a writer but more importantly as someone who can sit down and write. These pages are good and I'm going to buy a printer soon and show them to my boss. Speaking of my boss I've started taking work home with me to do faster with my high speed connection than I can in the office. I don't get paid for it, but frankly the $10 an hour was nothing anyway. I need to focus on moving on with my life, not staying in this worthless job for another 5 months.

I've been on the treadmill of life for way too long. Time to get off that and on to a real treadmill and a real life. Only without girls because GIRLS ARE YUCKY!

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