Here there be monsters (socratic) wrote,
Here there be monsters

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Modern movies suck

I have seen 3 films recently and they really aren't worth discussing in detail but I want to remark on each of them because I think they all have something to say about the problematic state of modern film making.

1) The Punisher:

This was by far the best of the three films and is, in fact, passable entertainment. I expected it to stink up my TV room and was pleasantly surprised when it didn't. It was an above average revenge flick with some watchable action, an okay performance from the lead, and a camera that actually stayed put long enough for you to see what was going on, unlike 90% of action movies since MTV poisoned the well. That being said the movie was plodding, predictable, and poorly scripted. The dialogue was obviously just filler for the action, and there were plenty of cheesy lines. So many action movies do this, start with a mediocre script and try to get by on mayhem and special effects, and it drives me nuts. Scripts matter, and when you build a movie around a bad one you stunt its growth from the beginning. The Punisher could have been a good movie, a really solid one, instead it's just watchable.

2) Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy.

Wow, this film was so much worse than I expected. Comedy is probably my favorite genre when done right, and I was expecting a lot out of this one based on what people said, but it's terrible. Just terrible. There are a few funny bits, especially with Steve Carell's character Brick Tamland, but mostly it's just like bad SNL. One note characters acting like jackasses isn't particularly funny, it's just sort of boring. The film plays like a bad frat party. There are moments when Will Ferrell's on screen with Christina Applegate and neither actor seems to be getting any direction at all so they just read their lines at one another and move on. Not good. Comedy needs to come from somewhere real, especially film comedy. With The Producers Mel Brooks tapped into real desperation and neurosis and sleaze and made it hilarious. Even Old School was based in the reality of male infantilization in our society, and had moments of pathos that made you care about the characters. Anchorman just has guys goofing off. I can see that on any stoop in New York City.

3) Resident Evil: Apocalypse

Dreck, unwatchable incoherent dreck. This is why the horror genre is the bane of good film making, because somewhere out there are a group of RETARDS who actually enjoy watching random stupid images flashed in front of them so long as they involve gore and babes. There's no point criticizing the script, there barely was a script, there barely was direction, this movie is basically a special effects team unleashed. It's not that good horror isn't possible, it's that it's pointless when teens will flock to absolute crap and spend their parents money freely on shit. Kafka wrote horror to illuminate the human soul. Paul Anderson writes horror because if they JUST showed special effects people might complain.
Tags: art, movies, reviews
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