Here there be monsters (socratic) wrote,
Here there be monsters
socratic

Pubescent

When I was around 11 I went to Disney World. While there I saw the stupid Indiana Jones stunt spectacular (It was anything but) and got a crappy Indiana Jones revolver and novel.

I didn't read the novel until a few weeks later, in bed in my country house. It had action, adventure, suspense, and, most importantly, an Irish grad student named Desiree. And while I kind of wanted to be Indiana Jones while he fought the crappily written bad guys and whipped his way past the scary snakes, I really wanted to be him when he was fucking Desiree. God I wanted to fuck Desiree. This was the cusp of puberty and the understanding that girls were good for something other than whining when the boys got too loud at recess.

Desiree had green eyes and big breasts and I would have given my fucking Nintendo for 48 hours in a hotel room with her, which is saying something.

There are certain doors once gone through you can't go back out again. Desiree was such a door for me.

I just realized tonight that Desiree was probably around the age I am now. If I met her today she would not be the exotic older woman full of knowledge and mystery, she'd just be Irish Desiree. And while I'd still want to fuck her, it would be from a position of equality.

In a few years I'll be older than Desiree and trolling for her will be a little dirty-old-mannish.

Desiree will always be in her mid 20's and I'll keep getting older and we're never going to fuck, no matter how many Nintendos I give up.
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