Here there be monsters (socratic) wrote,
Here there be monsters


I hate Michael Bay. I hate him I hate him I hate him.

After having seen "The Island", his latest film, I hate him even more. I hate him because he takes a good idea and a whole lot of money and just wastes them, right in front of us. It's like watching someone purchase a $1,500 dinner and then take a shit on it just to show that he can.

Bay got his start directing music videos and is apparently still committed to that even though he's been hired to make features. He cuts every 2 seconds or so, fills his films with stark images and jagged compositions, and just generally makes everything fractured and messy. This isn't always a bad thing, if the director knows what he's doing. Bay might, but he doesn't seem to care. Performances are never given a chance to grow because they're so fractured and cut to ribbons you can never really get a sense of what's going on. The forward momentum is frenetic and constant, even when the camera pauses to let the audience soak in what's going on and think for a moment it doesn't stay still long enough.

"The Island" could have been a good movie. It was probably a decent script. Instead the film is a mess that says nothing and spends its time blowing stuff up and making sure that the characters are all underwritten and hazily composed. There are a few good sequences, Michael Clarke Duncan gives a glimpse of what the movie should have been with a performance so pitch-perfect that not even Bay can destroy it, but it's all for naught.

OH but this could have been a good film. A four-starer. A shot in the arm to the sci-fi community. A classic even. Instead it's a shit sandwich on a loaf of really good bread. And it's Michael Bay's fault.
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