Also, I was watching a talkshow today (While working on my paper I watch TV, and uninteresting TV so it doesn't grab me...OKAY?) and there were these women on it with an absolute ton of displaced anger making rediculous claims. This show is called Talk Or Walk and on it people are supposed to be given ultimatums by loved ones, who then decide depending on how the other person responds whether to talk through the problem or walk away from the relationship. Generally it's friends or lovers and nobody really goes prepared to walk and its extremely lame but very easy watching requiring almost no attention. Anyway the show strayed from its normal format this time by inviting on a married couple who produce instructional pornography and give live instructional sex shows, and two ex-prostitutes who proceeded to yell ludicrous claims at the couple. Instead of attacking them as pornographers or perverts they yelled out things like "Pornography is prostitution," called the husband a pimp even though his wife was clearly doing everything willingly, and whined incessantly about their own admitadly sad stories while completely ignoring the facts. I'm not sure why this ticked me off but it did, maybe because these people were strangers so it had nothing to do with the normal format of the show and was clearly being used as a salacious audience draw,. maybe because these women were being irrational ultrafeminist loonies which always pisses me off, or maybe it was because of the complete bewilderment on the part of the host as to what he was supposed to do.
I think it's also something about misplaced rage and a combination of my guilt for having it and a lack of tolerance for it. I mean I understand that people have been hurt and this makes them angry, I go through that, but even if it warps your world view you shouldn't go around ESPOUSING it to others. I mean sure I don't trust people and I'm distant, unavailable, and incredibly aggressive and angry towards women, but this doesn't mean I want to convert other people into being how I am. I don't tell my friends who have girlfriends that they should break up with them and become celibate hermits. When I see other people doing the equivalent (Basically ranting that all sex is prostitution and rape unless it's feminist condoned sex) part of me feels like "That could be me!" and part of me feels like "How DARE you while I restrain myself."
*sigh* this is just another way to avoid studying. I've already played 5 games of video game football today. I'll get the work done but it's such a battle between boredom and interesting fun stuff. Why can't the world be less fucking boring? I think tests are horribly inept at educating, and I think most papers are worse. And my mother the professor makes me think less and less of the whole college system. I don't want a degree for any non-pragmatic reasons and that bothers me.