Today I spent about an hour talking on the internet to a high school friend about how likely it was that love was out there for him somewhere and providing evidence and logic for it being true. The thing is that at the time I BELIEVED what I was saying and now that I'm back to being self focused I still think it's true. It is perhaps a bit hypocritical then to claim that I should always remain alone when I am constantly pushing others to find eachother. I have ways around it through saying things like "Well he WANTS him some lovin' and I don't" but maybe I should try to get to the root of it. That might be useful. I'll file that away under "Things to ponder later when head is not so unclear."
My mother is a complete and utter LUNATIC. She asked me to go to a movie yesterday and I was, after 15 minutes of resistance, like "Okay, I guess, after the late football game" so she looks at the listings and she basically says that there are only two movies that she wants to see and one of them I DON'T want to see and the other is playing too late. So I suggest some alternates and she finally agrees to one she doesn't really want to see and I say "Well if I don';t really want to go to the movies at all and you don't really want to see this film why are we bothering" so she gets angry and says that she will go rent a movie. I say no, let's just go to the late showing of the one that we both want to see, and she agrees. Then she goes and rents a movie without telling me. Then she can't get it working so she makes me go fiddle with her VCR until the tape plays (I spent about 15 minutes searching for loose connections, couldn't find any, and just tried to play it normally. It worked fine. She's deranged) THEN this morning she asks me to reutrn the video tape to the rental place and gets extremely upset when I say "When's it due?" She acts like I'm asking so I can INTENTIONALLY hand it in late and cost her money. What's WRONG with her? I am just venting over this because I don't know what else to do.
in other News my New Years resolutions are almost finished. When I post them I will try hard to stick to them so I am currently combing out ones that might be too difficult for me to deal with.