I just had a shocking reminder of how juvenile my high school aquaintances actually are, and it frightened me. I made the unfortunate mistake of letting them look at my journal and one of them made a comment that chilled me to the core. No it wasn't about ME but....well...it's not really something I should discuss in a forum like this. The thing is that although the guy was clearly joking there was just enough of a hint of truth in there to make me think about how LITTLE you actually know about the people you know. I mean Jeffrey Dahlmer's neighbors found him rather normal. We put so much trust into our friends and aquaintances when any one of them could be a truly horrific being capale of truly unspeakable evils.
Maybe this is old news to most of you as I'm sure I'd be like "duh" if I read it in someone else's journal, but I had a startling and chilling reminder of the fragility of the ties that bind us.
This vacation feels wasted but I'm oddly okay with that. I mean I feel like I earned something real and tangible last semester, like by achieving high grades I made the boredom pain and guilt almost worth it.
But I also feel isolated. My mom suggested I re-start an old aquaintanceship with a guy I used to be friends for, but he's such a....Jock and that's not me. I dunno. Seems like a recipe for disaster. Maybe I should do it anyway, worst case scenario is boredom or embarassment. But, but....argh. Jeff's so gonna harass me over this.