Here there be monsters (socratic) wrote,
Here there be monsters

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Days just roll on by

Well school is starting to ramp up again and the days are starting to whir on by. Get up, shake out the cobwebs and do some chores and homework, eat breakfast and prepare for class, go to class and deal with other chores and more homework, lunch a little relaxation, more classes etc, GED teaching, by the time you've added a little bit of zoning out on Anime and Videogames or TV to the mix and some writing/internet chatting I find myself completely out of time. I don't know HOW people get their school work done, have social lives, AND get any serious thinking done in college. I guess they give up sleep but then how do they maintain a high standard on tests/papers without proper rest?

I don't know though it seems as if college is supposed to be some great, fun, place where you make tons of friends and learn who you are and for me it's just a highschoolish grind where you learn SOME stuff and have more inspiring teachers but are still just trying to get your hands on that little piece of paper that says that you should be paid a lot of money for your time and labor. I don't know, the biggest social event I've had in the last week or so was when I spent about an hour and a half yesterday talking to Joyce, this 50+ year old wacky woman I know from my summer Art hum class (Yeah why did I meet so many people over the summer? I don't know. I didn't make one significant contact last semester and ONLY one the semester before that. Maybe it's just the smaller classes and more class time) who has lead a very interesting life. Apparently she started out as an academic, became a musician because she WANTED to be an artist (Yeah umm...that one confused me a little too...and her) become a computer programmer just as things were starting to lift off, quit that and decided to become an art history major even though she does not want to be an art historian.

Yeah so she's interesting but not exactly a social contact or close friend. I don't know I feel pressured to have a traditional college experience with all the fixin's like dates with girls I don't really like and beer bongs. I feel like I'm wasting my youth. I just don't WANT dates with girls I don't like and I hate beer. But I want to have had the experience in the future. Get that? I might also mention that I can't get dates or beer, but that's besides the point. I don't know I just feel like there's a lot of pressure out there to do stupid stuff at THIS time. It's like recreational pressure, I was talking to Hee-Ann this weekend and we both agree that we are so stressed out during the week that when the weekend finally does roll around we really feel like we have to make the most of it and it's STRESSFUL. Have you ever woke up late on Saturday and realized that you overslept and cut into your recreation time? I have.

Anyway I just feel like I'm wasting my college years in academic study and high schooly recreation when I should be doing...other stuff. I should probably just forget it and go on with my current ways which are working okay, but I DO feel there's a lot missing in my life and maybe I should go out there and experiment. Of course what I really need to do now is my reading for my class. Plus I should mention that my power's gonna be off from 9-4 today so I can't exactly write this journal much longer (It's 8:50). I hope I can make it to school on time without clocks hehe. Not to mention that I don't go bored out of my mind without power.
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