Here there be monsters (socratic) wrote,
Here there be monsters

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Live your life restricted

I can honestly say that JUSTICE is falling into a similar trap to that of Memory: Cognition and Stress in that I love the material but am starting to really hate the way the coursework is organized. We had a quiz today which I got an answer wrong on because I hadn't done a reading, however that reading pertained to a subject we CLEARLY weren't going to get to today because we're behind in the lecture. So in other words he is trying to have US maintain the pace he set for the reading while he himself fails to maintain an appropriate pace in lecture (and he burns lots of time on administrative crap that could easily be handled via email) and that hardly seems just to me. Also I asked him today if he was going to be available in discussion section because I had a ton of questions and he said he'd be out of town with a little smirk. Like he was glad to escape the questions. I thanked him and calmly walked away before I started showing just how upset I was by that. I have this paper to do and it's going to be a fair amount of work and now I'm not sure I'll get such a fair shot at a decent grade anymore. I'll stay in the course because I DO enjoy it's another case of disillusionment for me. Furthermore I was pretty unhappy with a lot of the comments made in my journal this morning, to the point of deleting a couple of them. When I make what I think is a good post and my high school friends add off-topic or shallow comments just because they are bored...well...I feel like my writing has been sullied. I don't expect people to agree with me on every topic out there, even when that topic is about how I feel, but I do expect the responses to at least ATTEMPT insight, not to be stock from the hip uncreative smears of conventional "wisdom" The only person from high school who regularly comments in this journal whose comments don't bother me is Aaron, because he seems to always have at least SOMETHING worthwhile to say and he says it politely and with verbal skill which makes it entertaining to read. How someone could DEIGN to tell me that I'm "in love with the idea of being in love" boggles my mind considering that I have never CLAIMED to be in love (perhaps infatuated) and I am INCREDIBLY picky about the people I associate with and what my associations to them are. I don't even call people like Aaron who I speak to occasionaly with and know decently a friend because I don't feel I have that claim on them, to presume then that I would say I was in LOVE just for the sake of it is not only incorrect but a FUNDEMENTAL mistake which I actually find somewhat offensive. I'm not sure what I'm going to do, maybe shut down comments for this journal as a whole or perhaps just ask them in particular not to post (although I am egalitarian and don't really believe in censoring people from their opinions) but I'm not going to censor myself and I'm not, which means SOMEONE'S going to get censored.

It's funny how when you're starting to feel good about stuff like the way your journal's going or a class in particular those feelings can be shreded in so much less time than it took to build them up. Is ANYTHING not a sandcastle? I guess after 9/11 we learned that even concrete and steel can be kicked in if the bully's feet are big enough. Oh well I have class now and then I'll come back to delete/respond to the rest of this morning's crops of comments. The thing is that I feel like the type of people I WANT to comment are being scared away by the inanity of many of the people who do which leaves me in an interesting dilemma. In shutting out the problem you close down one of the main reasons it IS a problem.
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