Here there be monsters (socratic) wrote,
Here there be monsters

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As time progressed I've reassesed. I know that now, I know it best. It isn't all or nothing somewhere I know in the middle

Today is probably going to turn out to be one of those 20 hour college student days. I went to bed last night at 2:30 or so AM after finishing up some random stuff and doing some of the reading for Japanese History and woke up at 7:15 or so. Fortunatly since I've dropped a significant amount of weight I am hardly hurting for energy so I don't think the short sleep schedule will hold me back in any meaningful way.

I spent most of the morning working on my Japanese history homework. It was a lot longer and harder than I thought it would be but I got it done. That does mean that I haven't started my paper but I think I've finally settled on a topic and I've written most of the paper in my mind so hopefully I should fly through it. I also went off my diet today. I ordered a personal pizza (About an 8"er) It's not a huge deal since it's 4 small slices and amounts to probably 3 slices from a non-mini pizza which isn't too bad, plus I counted it as lunch and dinner. I had planned to do this and so I don't feel really guilty about it, it was a relatively small indulgence. The problem was that after eating half of it for lunch I felt all those gluttonous desires of old welling up. I went to the supermarket to buy tobasco sauce for the rest of the pizza and almost came out with a box of cookies or a bag of chocolate. I resisted though and instead bought some lowfat cottage cheese+pineapple and 2 litres of diet coke (I shouldn't be drinking it but I might need caffeine tonight and it won't really cause WEIGHT problems, it's just bad for the system). I can afford to eat unhealthy foods on occasion but I need to make sure that I limit myself like I did today. A personal pizza is not great but it's okay. A personal Pizza+A bag of Hershey's minis is a recipe for disaster (Both in terms of weight and taste. Who would want chocolate topped pizza? *shudder*)

In very slightly less pathetic news I went to see the psych major advisor today. I walked in expecting her to be a very formal severe professor with no time for inquires from nondeclared students. It seemed like my assumptions might be correct until I told her my name and she said "Oh are you the same Ben X (She used my real name) who went to Gardens Nursery School with my son?" From then on she was much more pleasant (In all fairness I don't know whether she just seemed a little distant at first because she was busy when I walked in and took 10 seconds to switch into social mode) and spent a few minutes asking me whether I remembered nursery school and who else I remembered from there (I didn't recall her son but in a strange coincedence I had bumped into another nursery school classmate the day before) We talked for awhile about options in the psychology department and she really played down the importance of honors. Maybe they AREN'T that essential after all. I talked to her about why I wanted to do psychology and she told me that while the specificity of psychological research could be attractive it could also be a burden at times. She told me that when she discovered what she wanted to do she was excited but now she's discovered that she has to follow SO many different leads and chase down so many variables it will probably take her the rest of her life to just sort out this one issue. It's sort of amazing and daunting at the same time. I mean I don't want to spend my whole life on one issue. Anyway I've decided to apply for Honors and see what'll happen. I am also going to declare for psychology since we were talking and it turns out that declaring your major at Columbia is about as permanent as gelling your hair up into a new style. On the way out of the office a couple girls who had been waiting to talk to the professor (Our meeting took about an hour) told me that to declare you just go in and write down your choice on a piece of paper which they file away. If you want to change majors they take that piece of paper and rip it in half and let you make a new one. It's kind of pathetic really but knowing that there's no big beauraucratic hassle in changing it I think I'm gonna do it. The advantage to declaring is that I can apply for honors and I will get announcements from the psych department about various opportunities. I have also decided that I am probably going to volunteer in a lab over the summer. It will help my chances for honors and it will also tell me whether or not I really want to persue academic psychology as a career choice. The only problem is that the application process...doesn't exist. You just find a professor who'se doing something you like and ask them if you can help. Ummm...Weird. Anyway the advisor suggested I talk to my TA from first semester freshman year who had offered to support my application to any program I wanted. The problem with that is that A) I don't think she liked me much, just approved of my academic prowess and B) She's stomach churningly mind thrashingly beautiful which is something that I really prefer to avoid. She has the sort of overpowering beauty that makes you both self-conscious and distracted. Hopefully I'll be able to find some other conduit into the department to search for research. I really DON'T want to ask her.

In other news I got a 95 on my statistics test which was okay but could have been better if I hadn't made stupid mistakes. Diana whined about how badly she did and got a 90. The group project is being taken over by the XX contingent because Adam never shows to class. Damn. Paul and I are in retreat, damn my big mouth for mentioning we only had 5 people and getting Chick3 invited to join us. And for the record THEY framed it in a gender war context before I did so keep your damn panties unbunched.

Not much else went on today...I REALLY have to get started on my Justice paper so I guess I will. A really busy day especially considering I had a class off but a fairly productive one anyway. Let's just hope that I don't collapse before night roles around. Caffeine must be my friend!

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